Our Anniversary

Some of you might think that today would be an especially hard day for me. Today, Myra and I would be celebrating 29 years of marriage. Honestly, I don’t know that today is any harder than yesterday, the week before or the month before. Every day I miss her smile, her laughter, her wit, they way she looked at life and how she valued people. Writing this is done through tears, as are moments every day since her passing. Everyone we loved that has died, died too soon. We all wish we had one more day, one more hour with the person before they passed.
Max Lucado wrote that death should be celebrated for those that have given their lives to Christ. We know that eternity with God is our final destination that should be likened to crossing the finish line after a long race. But instead of competing against each other, we are running the race alongside each other. Some will finish before us, some after, but all of us will cross that final finish line.
In my grief, I’m trying to find the joy, as I know Myra would want me to. I’m reminded of a post from Myra about lessons we can learn from a dog. Lily, our dog, misses Myra, but she doesn’t spend time in grief, she lives moment to moment. How do I know Lily misses Myra? For several days after Myra died, Lily would look past me into the garage to see if Myra was behind me. When I took Lily to the dog park for the first time after Myra died, Lily ran over to the places Myra would sit to see if she was there. On our travels back and forth to Illinois, we would always spend the night in Scottsdale AZ. This was one of our favorite cities, and also Lily’s, as they have a wonderful dog park near the hotel. On the way to Illinois for Myra’s memorial service, I took Lily to the dog park in Scottsdale. As soon as we entered the dog park, Lily excitedly ran over to every area that Myra would sit and looked for her. Lily continued to look for Myra at other areas that we would stop at along our route, and although disappointed it didn’t stop her from enjoying the dog park or rest area.
My grieving Myra’s loss will eventually fade and I will be able to remember the good times we had together instead of thinking about memories we will never have. Until that time, I need to take a lesson from Lily. Anticipate with joy the day Myra and I will be together, and make the most of each day until that day comes. Myra wrote about other lessons we can learn from a dog in her post Even a Dog gets It .

One thought on “Our Anniversary

  1. Irena (Morosow) Paz

    This was so bittersweet to read, both heart-wrenching, but yet written with such love and admiration for a very special soul, Myra! I met her at Good Counsel, one year ahead of me. Yet everyone knew her, due to her sparkling personality, her uniqueness, her love of life! I was very sad to hear of her transition, yet feel it’s only appropriate to say, I know she loved her husband with all her heart, and that makes me smile. I lost touch, but I am sure, that she continued to open eyes, reach hearts, and touch so many people! Myra, you will be missed, but also you will leave an indelible mark on our hearts, minds, and souls!

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